I believe I'm the first girl from Mumbai's red-light area to go to university abroad.

我一定是孟买红灯区第一个到海外上大学的女孩。

I grew up in a room at the top of a brothel in Kamathipura, a neighbourhood that people say is dark and dangerous. But three weeks ago I moved to New York, because I have a scholarship to study at Bard College.

我在卡马提普拉(Kamathipura)这个被认为是黑暗和危险之地的一家妓院顶楼的一间屋子里长大。但三周前我搬到了纽约，因为我获得了在巴德学院(Bard College)就读的奖学金。

I have to correct people who assume my mother is a prostitute. She is a devadasi, a term for women wedded to a deity who devote their lives to the temple, performing rituals and entertaining people. They are often associated with sex work but my mother told me she is only a devadasi in name and never lived that life.

我必须纠正人们认为我母亲是妓女的看法。她是一名神庙舞女，即与神结婚并将毕生献给庙宇、表演各种仪式、给人们提供娱乐的女性。她们经常被与性工作联系起来，但我的母亲告诉我，她只是在名义上是一个神庙舞女，从来都没有参与性工作。

She worked in a factory all day, so I was brought up by the women in the brothel.

她整天都在一家工厂工作，因此我是由妓院里面的女人们养大的。

I remember them playing with me, bringing me sweets, smacking me when I misbehaved. They would dress up first thing in the morning, before heading off to the streets. I'd see them fighting over customers, handing money to madams and bargaining with clients - factory workers who pay about Rs150 (GBP1.55) each.

我还记得她们与我玩耍，给我糖吃，我不听话的时候也揍我。每天早晨在上街之前她们都会梳妆打扮一番。我看到她们为争夺顾客而打架、交钱给老鸨子、与顾客讨价还价。她们的顾客就是工厂里的工人们，每次服务大约支付150卢布（1.55英镑）。

I wasn't allowed to leave the house after 8pm. Sometimes there were raids at night - the women would pull on their nightgowns and run but the police chased them, demanding bribes and often making them scapegoats in unrelated cases.

晚上八点之后，我就不能离开家里。有时候晚上会遇到突袭，这些女人们会穿上睡衣逃跑，但警察会跟着追，向她们索贿，并且还经常将她们作为不相干案子的替罪羊。

Many of the sex workers are sold into the industry and spend their lives struggling to pay their debt to the brothel owner, so they can leave Kamathipura. I remember one woman managed to save up enough money to escape. She left the brothel weeping, dressed in her best clothes and carrying all her bags. Everybody was waiting to say goodbye as she walked through the streets.

很多性工作者是被卖到这个行业的，她们要花毕生的时间艰难偿还欠妓院老板的债务，这样她们才能逃离卡马提普拉。我印象中就有一个女的攒到了足够的钱逃离了这个地方。她是哭着离开的，穿上她最好的衣服、带上所有的包裹。当她走过大街时，每个人都等待着和她告别。

The community feels like a big family. It is not the sex workers that are the danger but the men who come into the area. Stories of clients abusing the women aren't uncommon and as a child I was not only propositioned but sexually abused too. People ask why I talk about abuse so openly. They think it's shameful. But if we don't talk about it, how will the problem be solved? I haven't always been so confident, though. I was bullied at school because of my dark skin. I was called names like “cow dung”. I had no self-esteem and never studied. But I was smart - people used to ask how I got such good grades without working.

这个社区就像一个大家庭。危险不是来自性工作者，而是来自进入这个地区的男人。这些女人受到虐待的事情并不少见。作为一个孩子我遭到过骚扰，也被性侵过。人们问我为什么敢公开谈论被性侵的事情，因为他们认为这是可耻的。但如果我们不说的话，这个问题怎么能解决呢？但我也并不总是这么自信。因为我肤色黑，在学校经常受欺负。我经常被称作“牛粪”或者其他什么绰号。我没有自尊可言也从来不学习。但我很聪明，人们曾问我为什么不学习能获得这么好的分数。

A year ago I moved into a shelter for women from the red-light district, run by an organisation called Kranti, who also gave me counselling. That's when I gained confidence, and I could concentrate better on my studies. The girls at Kranti are good friends. We've been trekking in the Himalayas and have travelled around Kerala, giving talks and holding workshops on sexual health and trafficking. But some of the girls have boyfriends and I don't like the way the boys tell them what to wear and try to control their lives.

一年前，我从红灯区搬到一个妇女避难所，这是一个叫做“革命”(Kranti)的组织建立的，他们也给我提供咨询。从那时起我就能够树立信心，也能够更好地将精力放在学习上。“革命”组织的女孩们都是好朋友。我们曾去喜马拉雅山徒步，也去喀拉拉邦(Kerala)旅行过，就性健康和非法交易发表一些讲话，举办座谈会。但一些女孩有男朋友，我不喜欢这些男孩们告诉她们穿什么衣服或者试图控制她们生活的行为。

When I decided I wanted to study abroad, an alumnus of Bard College who had heard me speak at a conference helped me get a place. I have a full tuition scholarship but I'm still raising money for living expenses through crowdfunding websites. I'm excited about Bard, of course, but I'm also a little nervous. I know I'll have to write weekly essays but I don't have the study skills or concentration span for that - not yet, anyway.

当我决定要去国外留学的时候，巴德学院一位曾在一次会议上听过我演讲的校友帮助我获得了一个名额。我拿到了全额奖学金，但我还在通过众筹网站筹集生活费。能上巴德学院我很兴奋，这是不用说的，但我还是有点紧张。我知道以后我每周都要写论文，但我没有这样的学习技能，或者说不能长时间把注意力集中在学习上，至少现在没有。

Before I left, some people started to treat me differently. My stepfather's family used to say I was useless, that I'm not pretty and never did housework. Now though, they're suddenly so warm, even asking me to visit their village.

在我离开之前，一些人对我的态度就发生了变化。我继父一家人过去老说我没用，不漂亮，也从不做家务。但现在他们却突然变得如此和蔼，甚至还让我去他们村子看看。

My plan is to return to Kamathipura after I graduate, to open a free counselling centre for sex workers. But if it was up to me, prostitution would be legal. Then these women could get proper healthcare and go to the police when they're abused. It would help Kamathipura become an accepted community.

我的计划是毕业之后回到卡马提普拉，成立一个面向性工作者的免费咨询中心。如果让我来决定的话，卖淫应该合法化。这样的话这些女人就能够得到合适的医疗，在受到虐待的时候向警察求助。这也有助于卡马提普拉成为一个为人们所接受的社区。