I'd been poorly for a few months before being rushed into hospital one Friday morning in May. At first, I was told I had breast cancer. It was a shock, but that's okay I thought, people survive.
Five days later, I was told that it did spread to my bones, that I had secondary breast cancer, and that it was terminal.
五天后,我被告知癌细胞确实扩散到了我的骨头,我得了继发性乳腺癌,而且是晚期。
That year passed in a blur of hospital appointments, scans chemo and radiotherapy. I only found out later that I wasn't expected to make it past Christmas. The moment I was told I had a terminal illness something inside me changed, and I became stronger.
Don't get me wrong, I was scared - so scared. You assume you're going to die almost immediately and all I could think about were my children. They needed me.
My relationship didn't work out, so now I'm a single mom to three gorgeous children. It's hard, it's tiring but it gives me something to focus on and a reason to get out of bed every day.
I urgently needed to give them experiences, make memories. I didn't know how long I had, so time was of the essence. We did so much in that first year.
You almost have to grieve the life you were living and the future you had planned. But slowly, very slowly, you adjust and somehow you find a new normal. Every so often, I struggle. I have waves of emotion and I've had to learn to ride them. They pass, usually.
Not only am I living with my cancer and the medicines I have to take to keep me alive. I'm also living with all the crap normal life throws at you. It was my Macmillan nurse who helped me navigate that, sorting my finances and accessing the payments I needed to help me.
They have been amazing actually. You can feel very alone when you have cancer and it's so important to have someone to support you, like the people I have met through Macmillan. I've done a McMillan Coffee Morning too before and raised over 400 pounds. It means a lot that people care enough to raise money.
I'm stable at the moment. I know that I will never be celebrating an “all clear” milestone, but I do mark the day I was diagnosed every year. We mark these milestones, these years I never thought I would have, and I feel lucky. Six years ago, I was given six months to live.
I am Emma and Emilia has told my story in the hope that you will keep supporting the work of Macmillan. We need your help now more than ever. If you can, please make a donation to Macmillan right now. Thank you.