Childhood is precious,

But if we knew the whole truth then,

It would make our memories dark,

So here’s your childhood ruined.

The Little Mermaid movie poster featured dicks, not a lie.

And the original story of The Mermaid ended

When the Little Mermaid died.

The Land Before Time was awesome,

Ducky’s voice was a little girl’s “quack”.

Her real dad murdered her in cold blood,

That’s why Ducky’s voice did not come back.

Childhood ruined, childhood ruined, the truth is out there, and the truth is wow.

Childhood ruined, childhood ruined, if it wasn’t ruined before, it’s ruined now!

“How about writers?”

The author of Peter Pan kept the book upon the shelf.

He forged a will to get custody of kids then Peter killed himself.

The guy who wrote James and the Giant Peach really hated the Jews,

And Lewis Carroll of Wonderland was a pedophile too.

The writer of The Giving Tree was a poetry machine,

His children’s poems were so pornographic,

They were first published in Playboy Magazine.

Childhood ruined, childhood ruined, sorry to sacrifice your sacred cow.

Childhood ruined, childhood ruined, if it wasn’t ruined before, it’s ruined now!

E.T.wasn’t always a puppet,

He was played by a kid born with no legs.

During Milo and Otis, tons of dogs died,

But sometimes you gotta break a couple eggs.

Childhood ruined, childhood ruined, no more “barks”, no more “meows”.

Childhood ruined, childhood ruined, if it wasn’t ruined before, it’s ruined now.

So when it comes down to the truth,

Sometimes you must just surrender,

The principal from Ferris Bueller is a registered sex offender.

More child starts overdose,

Than time in this song will allow,

And so I have to ask you:

“Is your childhood ruined now?”