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不见面时期的五个社交策略

发布者: 千缘 | 发布时间: 2020-7-11 02:28| 查看数: 105| 评论数: 1|

How to Network When You Can’t Meet Up with People

不见面时期的五个社交策略

To make business connections in the age of coronavirus, people need to go online to form relationships and nurture them. That means throwing out the old strategies

为了在新冠疫情期间建立业务联系,人们需要在网上建立并培养关系,这意味着要舍弃旧时策略。

Alexandra Samuel

亚历山德拉·塞缪尔



It is hard to be an effective networker when you can’t shake hands, go to a conference or meet at a restaurant. But we rely on connections to generate business, fuel our professional growth – and, as we are all now reminded, to sustain our own personal well-being.

当我们无法握手,无法参加会议,也无法在餐厅见面时,我们很难进行有效沟通。我们依靠人脉来发展业务,推动职业发展,以及如现在常被提醒的那样维持生活幸福感。

The good news is that developing and deepening relationships at this moment is still possible. You just need to rethink the way you go about it.

好消息是,在当下仍有可能发展深厚关系。你只是需要重新考虑处理方式。

I know because I’ve done it already. Even though I was once a voracious face-to-face networker, both geography and family circumstances have meant that my past decade of networking has taken place almost entirely online. And the relationships I’ve developed this way have been at least as meaningful and valuable as the connections I once made at in-person gatherings.

我知道你可以,因为我已经做到了。尽管我曾经热衷于面对面交流,但地理位置和家庭环境都导致了我过去数十年的人际交流几乎都是在网络上进行的。我用这种方式建立起来的人际关系与在面对面聚会中建立的关系至少具有同等意义和价值。

Here are some of the strategies that have worked for me over the years—and might work for you, too.

以下是多年来一些对我而言行之有效的方法,可能对你也会有帮助。

Prioritize quality over quantity

质大于量

Let’s explode one myth: that networking online is about casting a wide net. Resist the illusion that you can make a ton of new contacts with all the time you’re spending online. Think in terms of quality, not quantity.

让我们打破在线社交就是广撒网的想法,不要幻想在网上花很多时间就可以结交很多新朋友。要着重质量而不是数量。

By “quality” I don’t mean looking at metrics like how many followers an influencer has. I pay attention to people whose work interests or inspires me, whose posts resonate, or whose life and professional experience gives me a fresh perspective. Conversely, I take note of people who follow me online or share my articles; a quick scan through their bio or social-media feed usually gives me a feel for whether we’ll have interests in common, in which case I make a point of following them back, or if I’m going to be in their city, suggest a meeting. (These days, I’d suggest a phone or video call instead.)

我所说的“质量”并不是指看一个意见领袖有多少粉丝这类指标。我会关注那些我感兴趣或给我启发的人,他们的贴文引起我的共鸣,他们的生活和专业经验给予我全新的视角。我会反过来注意那些在网上关注我或分享我文章的人,快速浏览他们的个人简介或社交媒体信息,我能感受到我们是否有有共同的兴趣,在这种情况下,我会回关他们,或者如果我要去他们的城市,我就会提议见一面,而现在我则会建议用电话或视频通话替代。

When I’m spending time on social networks, I use lists or “see first” features to focus my attention on the small number of people I find most interesting or valuable, so that I can engage with them regularly; it’s easier to form new connections by interacting with 10 people on a regular basis, rather than 100 people very occasionally. I aggressively unsubscribe from email lists so that the emails I get from colleagues and friends don’t get lost. I comment and reply to posts from the same people, over and over, so it feels like we’re actually in one long conversation.

我上社交网络时,会使用列表或“先看”功能,把注意力放在我认为最有趣或最有价值的少数人上,这样我就可以经常与他们互动。定期与10个人互动,而不是偶尔与100个人互动,这样更容易建立新联系。我的电子邮件列表退订得很勤,这样就不会遗漏同事和朋友的电子邮件。我反复评论和回覆同一个人的贴子,感觉就像我们在长谈一样。

Many of these relationships ultimately pay professional dividends. I’ve found clients, speaking opportunities, new writing outlets and valued employees just through the relationships I sustained entirely out of affection, with no endgame in mind.

许多这种关系最终会带来职业上的回报。我得到了客户、演讲机会、新的写作渠道和有价值的员工,依靠的就是完全出于感情而维持的关系,而非出于目的性。

Network in a way that feels true to who you are

以真实自我建立人际关系

Are people wowed by your intellect? Think about how to share digestible nuggets of that brilliance in online posts or updates. If your brain power typically comes to light in the discussion after a meaty talk or lecture, look for virtual events focused around a thought leader, where there is plenty of opportunity for peer-to-peer conversation or Q&A.

别人会为你的才智惊叹吗?思考一下如何在网上的贴子或更新中分享自己智慧的闪光点。如果你的才智往往在激烈的演讲或讲座后的讨论中得以显露,不妨找找思想领袖的线上活动,那里有很多一对一对话或问答的机会。

Do you win people with warmth and charm? Focus on making individual, personal connections before you scale up to large-group interactions. If you’re at your best when you’re one on one, skip online events and groups, and reach out directly to the people you want to meet, asking for a video or phone date so that you can connect on a topic of mutual interest.

你用热情和魅力来赢得人们的喜爱吗?先集中精力建立个人的人际关系,然后再扩大到大型群体互动。如果你在一对一的时候处于最佳状态,那就跳过在线活动和小组,直接联系你想要见的人,要求视频或电话约会,这样你就可以就共同感兴趣的话题进行交流。

Or are you someone who wows with a glamorous, oversize presence? Then you’re among the handful who can’t afford to embrace this new lifestyle of sweatshirts and chaotic kitchen backdrops; Instead, you’ll need to dial up the star power so that it comes through even on your one-to-one video calls.

亦或你是个魅力四射的大人物?那么你就是少数不适合运动衫加混乱厨房背景新生活方式的人;相反,你需要放大明星效应,使其在一对一的视频通话中也能体现出来。

This principle extends to how you build relationships once you’ve nailed the intro. If you’re the kind of person who usually works your way through a cocktail party or networking lunch by introducing various sets of people, you can pursue that same strategy in the online world. (Just make sure you ask both parties before making that email introduction.)

这个原理可以延伸到一旦你抓住了介绍的机会后如何建立关系。如果你经常在鸡尾酒会或社交午餐上介绍各种各样的人,那你也可以在网络世界中采用相同的策略。当然用电子邮件做介绍前一定要先询问下双方意愿。

If you’re famous for being a great listener, remember that you can listen to people without being in the same room: Reach out to people with phone calls, just to find out how they’re doing, or “listen” online by resharing other people’s posts and updates, annotated with your own thoughtful comments so it’s clear that you’re really engaging with what they have to say.

如果你善于倾听,你也可以在不同处一室的情况下倾听:打个电话了解他人在做什么,或是通过转发别人的贴子和更新倾听,加上自己深思熟虑的评论,显示自己确实在关注他们的话,这就是“在线倾听”。

And if you prefer to build relationships through recurring gatherings, like monthly networking lunches, you can look for standing social-media chats that take place at a regularly scheduled date and time, and make a point of participating on a continuing basis. You might begin with the online groups/channels/hashtags that connect with your favorite offline networking groups; that way you’re building on top of existing relationships.

而且,如果您更喜欢通过定期聚会来建立关系,例如每月的联络午餐,可以查找固定的日期和时间,进行例行社交媒体聊天,并持续参与。您可以从与喜爱的线下群组有联系的在线群组/频道/主题标签开始,这样就可以在现有关系之上建立新的联系。

Amplify other people

放大他人的声音

It is easy for online networking to feel like a bunch of people shouting for attention – which is why you will stand out if you’re amplifying other people’s voices instead of just competing to be heard. Share what other people have said, maybe adding a comment of your own, and make that at least half of what you share. It will make you more appealing to engage with, too.

网络社交很容易让人感觉像一群人在大喊大叫,吸引注意力,因此如果你放大别人的声音,而不是抢着让别人听到自己的声音,就能脱颖而出。分享别人说的话,或许再加上自己的评论,让这样的内容占自己分享内容的至少一半。这也会让你更有吸引力。

This approach is also a good way to engage with a famous or influential leader or colleague. One of the things that’s really amazing about social media is that you may actually get to know the people who inspire you. Try resharing an article by a business leader you admire, with some reflections on what their work has meant to you, and why you admire them. Just keep that kind of thing to an occasional indulgence: There is nothing more off-putting than a social-media feed that makes it look like you’re just tagging industry star after industry star.

这也是与知名或有影响力的领袖或同事互动的好方法。社交媒体最令人惊奇的一点是,你真的可以结识到那些激励你的人。你可以尝试转发一篇你钦佩的商业领袖的文章,并评论他们的工作对你的意义,以及你钦佩他们的原因。但在社交媒体上接连提及行业大人物只能偶尔为之,没有什么比这样的信息流更让人反感的了。

As you start to follow and engage with people who have a big professional presence, you’ll probably notice that generosity fuels generosity. People who share their knowledge and insights generously tend to build and engage bigger followings. So, along with amplifying others, be prepared to share your own ideas in updates, blog posts, videos and conversations.

当您开始关注和接触那些具有很高专业水准的人时,你可能会注意到,慷慨助长了慷慨。那些慷慨分享知识和见解的人会培养和吸引更多的追随者。因此,放大他人声音的同时,也要在更新、博文、视频和对话中分享你自己的想法。

Look for ways you can be of service

寻求服务他人的方法

At a time when so many people are struggling financially, professionally or emotionally, cold calls or sales-y emails may come off as insensitive. You may fare better by reaching out around a community-service project.

现如今很多人挣扎于财务、专业或情感上的问题,此时的随机电话营销或销售性电子邮件会显得不那么近人情,因此参与社区服务项目效果可能会更好。

That is what I discovered when I started a small Covid support site. I reached out to a collegial email list I’ve belonged to for years, and got several offers of volunteer support. I found a couple of new collaborators in people I’d previously known only as social-media friends. And the software company that generously assigned several staff members to the project saw benefits, too, like getting its software in front of a whole new group of users. None of these efforts were intended as networking plays, but the simple effort of trying to do some good brought us all together and provided tangible professional benefits.

这是我创建一个小型新冠疫情相关网站时发现的。我在自己多年来所属的大学电子邮件列表里搜寻了一番,得到了几个志愿者的支持。我发现了几个以前在社交媒体上认识的新合作者。而为该项目慷慨分配了几名员工来支持我们的软件公司也得到了好处,例如可以将软件展示在全新的用户群体面前。这些行为都不是为了建立关系网,努力尝试做一些好事将我们聚集在一起,并提供了切实的专业效益。

Indeed, that desire to be of service should guide as much of your online networking as possible. Face to face, you can get away with some pretty direct requests for favors, if they’re delivered with tact and charm; online, it’s easy for incoming requests to feel like a siege by inbox.

确实,在线社交应尽可能多地围绕为他人服务来开展。在线下,如果你的表达方式机智且富有魅力,你可以直接提出一些请求并获得应允。而在线上,请求则很容易淹没在收件箱里。

Rather than thinking in terms of putting favors in the bank, think about how you can be the most helpful; the kind of person others feel grateful to know and eager to connect with. That means looking at your skills, knowledge and relationships, and thinking about where they can be uniquely valuable.

与其考虑提供帮忙,不如考虑如何才能让自己最有用,成为别人很希望能结识并渴望与之建立联系的那种人。这意味着要看你的技能、知识和人际关系,思考它们在哪些方面具有独特的价值。

If you’re a fluent techie, maybe you can put your skills to use for a person or organization who is struggling to move their work online; if you’re known for your contagious calm, perhaps you can lend yourself to a high-stress team and help defuse their anxiety. Even if you normally evaluate your time by the billable hour, this is a time to allocate some pro bono hours to people, causes and organizations you care about – or to offer that help to people and organizations you would like to get to know.

如果你是熟练的技术人员,你或许可以将自己的技能用于帮助那些正在努力将其工作转移到线上的个人或组织;如果你有可以影响他人的冷静作风,也许可以帮助一支压力很大的团队,减轻他们的焦虑。即使你平时花时间提供的服务要计费,现在也是为你关心的人、事业和组织分配一些无偿时间的时候,或者是为您想认识的人和组织提供帮助的时候。

Let go of the line between ‘personal’ and ‘professional’ relationships

打破“个人”与“业务”关系之间的界限

Many of us were taught to keep things crisp and professional in the workplace, but online, all that professionalism just comes off as cold and calculating. Instead, let yourself be warmly, casually human; you’ll be a lot more appealing if you seem like an actual person. And letting go of the line between “business contact” and “friend” means you’ll form stronger, more durable relationships.

我们中许多人受到的教导是要在职场保持纯粹和专业,但是在网上,所有这些专业主义都变得冷冰冰且斤斤计较。你要让自己变成一个温暖随和的人。如果你看起来更真实,就会更具吸引力。放开“业务联系”和“朋友”之间的界限,意味着形成更牢固、持久的关系。

We are in an exceptionally emotional and connected moment, and that means that people are unusually open to expressions of affection and sincerity. Yes, you can send a note to the colleague you haven’t spoken to in years, letting him know that he’s on your mind as someone you’re sorry you lost touch with; yes, you can write a fan letter to the star of your favorite TED Talk, telling her how she’s influenced your approach to this crisis. If you can let yourself be informal and vulnerable, rather than businesslike or transactional, you’re much more likely to form a human connection – one that will turn into a sincere, continuing relationship.

我们正处在一个异常需要情感联系的时刻,这意味着人们会异常开放地表达情感和诚意。是的,你可以给你多年未与之交谈的同事发送便条,让其知道你有记挂着他/她,不想失去联系;是的,您可以给您最喜欢的TED演讲明星写一封粉丝信,告诉他/她如何影响你应对这场危机。如果您可以让自己显得不那么一本正经,也可以显现有点脆弱,而不是像开展业务或做交易那样,那么你会更有可能形成人与人之间的联系,这样的联系会变成一种真诚持续的关系。

I’ve forgotten the business origins of some of my social contacts in a sea of exchanges over our parenting challenges, favorite TV shows or tech gripes. It is this mix of professional and personal interaction that makes contacts and colleagues into friends, and creates a sense of true camaraderie and affection. You might think that all my Facebook posts about child struggles or moments of personal anxiety would count against me in a professional context, but instead, it seems to have made a lot of people feel like they care for me.

我已经忘了与一些联系人建立关联之初的业务目的,而沉浸在与他们无所不聊的消息海洋中,聊为人父母的挑战、喜欢的电视节目或吐槽技术。正是这种专业和个人互动的结合,使联系人和同事成为朋友,并创造出一种真正的友情和感情。你可能会认为,在专业环境下,发表关于育儿难题或个人焦虑的帖子都会对我不利,但事实恰恰相反,似乎使很多人因此感到他们要关心我。

Those sincere, long-term relationships are ultimately what we’re all after, as businesspeople and just as humans. If you focus your networking on maximizing business value, your would-be contacts will smell your hunger a mile away; you’ve got to genuinely let it go, and think instead about who you want to befriend.

那些真诚的长期关系最终将成为我们作为生意人和一般人类所追求的。如果将网络专注于最大程度地提高业务价值,那么潜在的联系人很远就可以嗅到你的意图。你必须真正放开,然后再考虑想与谁成为朋友。

Try this thought experiment: It is 12 months after the release of the Covid vaccine, and life is finally returning to normal. So you decide to throw a big party, and invite all the people who have really meant something to you during this time.

试想一下,如果新冠疫苗发布已经12个月了,生活终于恢复了正常。你要举办一个大型聚会,邀请所有在这段时间内对你真正有意义的人。

Who do you see in that room? This is the question to keep front and center as you think about what it means to build and sustain a network in the months ahead. And when this difficult period ends, you’ll be able to look forward to a network full of people you know, value and trust.

你会邀请谁来?你要优先集中思考的问题是,在未来几个月中建立和维持关系网的意义。当这个困难时期结束时,你可以拥有一个由你认识、珍视和信任的人组成的网络。



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su_zh 发表于 2020-7-11 11:17:55
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