英语家园

 找回密码
 注册

QQ登录

只需一步,快速开始

搜索

谢谢窃包贼

发布者: chrislau2001 | 发布时间: 2009-5-18 16:04| 查看数: 1703| 评论数: 3|

本帖最后由 chrislau2001 于 2009-5-18 16:06 编辑

How a handbag thief gave me 10 reasons to be grateful

Last Wednesday, I had lunch with a colleague at a sandwich bar across the road from the office. We sat facing each other over a little table and ate soup from limp cardboard cups. I had slung my handbag across the back of my chair and, when we stood up to leave, I found that the bag had left before me. I'd been so consumed by office gossip that I hadn't noticed someone had quietly helped themselves to my beautiful, supple brown leather bag – and to my entire working life that was inside it.

Bother, bollocks, bugger, blast, I thought.

I'd bought the bag a year ago – in that impossibly long ago age when it still seemed a good idea to spend an unconscionable amount of money on a handbag. Inside was a BlackBerry, iPod, £200 in cash, a wallet containing a stack of credit cards and passes, a wad of receipts for unclaimed expenses, two notebooks, my diary and my keys.

Here, I thought angrily, is the ugly side of recession. Casual crime is on the rise and the lawless and the desperate are roaming the streets nicking the handbags of gossiping office workers.

Yet, after a while, the rage subsided and I found I was in rather higher sprits than I had been before the incident. I gave this some thought and decided there are 10 consolations to having your bag swiped, many of them quite substantial.

1. Being stripped of your BlackBerry and mobile is rather nice. You panic for the first 10 minutes but, after that, it's enjoyable. If anyone wishes to talk to you, they have to make an effort – and, luckily, no one seems to want to talk to me badly enough to try, so I've been left in peace.

2. Being without money is surprisingly nice, too, as people keep buying you things. So far today, I've been treated to a coffee, a Diet Coke and a Kit Kat. My husband slipped me a couple of 20s as I left the house this morning. I may have lost £200 but will have saved that much by the time my new cards arrive.

3. It's not your fault. This is a great morale boost. In the past few weeks, I have accidentally thrown away an FT mobile phone and wrecked a BlackBerry by putting it into the washing machine. On each occasion, I felt shame and remorse. This time, however, I was victim rather than perpetrator, and people have been astoundingly sympathetic. The staff in the restaurant have offered me a free lunch next week. The charming call centre worker at my bank gave her condolences as if I had just suffered a tragic bereavement.

4. One has a story to tell. Such is the tedium of office life, a little drama is always welcome.

5. I keep finding things that I thought were in my bag but turned out to be under my desk or in my pocket and, each time, I experience a stab of pleasure. I've found my silver fountain pen! Hooray! And my make-up bag! Hurrah!

6. When my new credit cards arrive, I'll be able to go shopping for nice new stuff.

7. We needn't worry so much about CCTV cameras taking away our liberty. The footage from the camera in the sandwich bar failed to catch anything suspicious, which meant that the civil liberty of the miserable thief was left intact.

8. I have fallen in love (see below).

9. I feel superior to David Cameron. Spookily, the leader of the Conservative party had his bike stolen on the same day that my bag was taken. As my padlock is top-of-the-range, no one can touch my bike – which was safely locked outside the office. Too safely, alas, given that my key was missing. That afternoon, I had three FT maintenance men standing over the bike and trying in vain to smash the lock with wire cutters and a hacksaw. One of them then suggested a grinder but that would have involved running an electric cable out on to the pavement and the Health and Safety Executive gets into a terrible flap about that sort of thing.

The men then promised to try again in the dead of night when the HSE would be tucked healthily and safely into their beds. They assured me that my bike would be free the next morning. So I borrowed a fiver for a Tube ticket and went home bagless and bikeless. The next day, I arrived at work to find the bike still locked up outside. That left me one option – to throw myself at the mercy of the fire brigade.

So, last Thursday morning, I walked down to Southwark fire station and rang an old-fashioned bell. The huge red doors slid open and a hunky fireman with shaved head listened to my tale and said he'd ask his boss. The boss, a sweet looking boy who looked about 15, said they'd be round in a jiffy. A few minutes later, a great red fire engine with a flashing blue light drew up outside the office. It did a U-turn – stopping traffic in both directions – and out jumped not one but four firemen. Two of them got busy with a power generator and the world's largest pair of secateurs. The other two flanked me on the pavement and submitted themselves to wild, gushing thanks. The lock was swiftly cut and I had the freedom of London again.

10. London is not overrun with thieves trying to do you over. It is overrun with people who are kind and helpful, and four of them are heavenly, handsome firemen.

评分

参与人数 1鲜花 +10 收起 理由
阑珊心语 + 10 比较生活的文章,易吸引我们阅读 ...

查看全部评分


最新评论

chrislau2001 发表于 2009-5-18 16:10:24
上周三,我和一位同事在公司对面的三明治吧共进午餐。我们在一张小桌前对面而坐,用软塌塌的纸杯喝汤。当我们起身准备离开时,我发现挂在椅背上的手袋已经不翼而飞。我太投入于办公室八卦之中,没发觉有人私自拿走了我那个漂亮柔软的褐色皮包,而那个包里装着我的全部工作生活。

烦人,可恨,卑鄙,该死……我心里骂道。

包是我一年前买的——距今似乎已经无比遥远,当时花大钱买一个手袋还不会显得出格。包里有一部黑莓手机(BlackBerry),一个iPod音乐播放器,200英镑现金,装着一叠信用卡和通行卡的钱包,各种未报销的收据,两本笔记本,我的日记和钥匙。

我气愤地想,这就是经济衰退中丑陋的一面。随意而为的犯罪正在增加。那些无法无天、走投无路的人漫步街头,看到正在交流八卦的上班族的手袋,就顺手牵羊。

但过了一会儿,怒火平息了,我发现自己的情绪反而比遭窃前更好。我对此做了一番思考,总结出了包被偷后可以得到的10种安慰,其中不少颇有价值。

1.黑莓手机和移动电话遭窃其实是件不错的事。开始的10分钟,你会惊慌失措,但随后你会发现,这令人愉快。如果有人要联系你,就不得不付出一番努力——幸运的是,似乎没有人那么迫切地要与我联系,因此也就没人来打扰我。

2.身无分文也是件出人意料的美事,因为总有人要为你买单。今天,已经有人请我喝了一杯咖啡,一瓶健怡可乐,以及一包雀巢Kit Kat巧克力。今早出门时,我先生还塞给我几张20英镑。虽然损失了200英镑,但新卡到手前,我想必已经把这笔钱攒出来了。

3.这不能怪你。这么一想,就能理直气壮,精神振奋。过去几周里,我意外丢失了一部FT手机,因扔进洗衣机里而毁了一部黑莓手机。这两件事无一不让我感到羞愧和懊悔。但这一次,我成了受害者,人们对我满怀同情,令我大为意外。那家餐厅的员工请我下周去那里享受一顿免费午餐。银行客服中心语音迷人的接线员也向我表示同情,好像我刚经历了丧亲之痛一般。

4.你有故事可讲了。办公室生活是如此沉闷,带一点戏剧性的故事,总是颇受欢迎。

5.我陆续在桌子底下和衣服口袋里找到了原以为已随包丢失的物品,每次发现都令我心头一阵欣喜。找到我的银质钢笔了!太好了!还有我的化妆包!太好了!

6.等到新的信用卡到手,我就能上街购物,添置新东西了。

7.我们无需太担心闭路电视(CCTV)摄像头会剥夺我们的自由。三明治吧摄下的录像片段没能捕捉到任何疑点。也就是说,那个可怜的小偷保住了自己的公民自由。

8.我坠入了爱河(见下文)。

9.我觉得自己的运势比大卫•卡梅隆好(David Cameron,英国保守党领袖——译注)。诡异的是,在我遭遇窃包的同一天,这位保守党领袖的自行车也被盗了。由于我的自行车挂锁很高档,没人有本事把它偷走——它安全地被锁在办公楼外。可惜太安全了,因为,唉,车钥匙丢了。那天下午,三名《金融时报》的维修工人在我的车前俯身撬锁,动用了剪钳和钢锯,但都不管用。其中一人建议使用磨床,但需要拉一条电缆到人行道上,而这么做将把卫生与安全管理局(HSE)闹得心神不宁。

他们随后答应,会等到夜深人静、HSE的人安然入睡时再试一次。他们向我保证,我的自行车第二天一早就能重获自由。于是我借了5英镑买了张地铁票,既没包也没车地回家了。第二天我到公司时,发现自行车仍然锁在外面。我别无选择,只能求助于消防队。

于是,我在上周四早晨步行来到南华克(Southwark)消防站,按响了一个样式古老的门铃。红色大门随即拉开,一位剃光头的好人消防员听完我的遭遇后,说要去问一下他的上司。这位上司是一个外形甜美的男孩,看上去也就15岁左右。他表示他们将马上赶到。几分钟后,一辆巨大的红色消防车闪着蓝灯开到我们的办公楼前,掉头来了个180度转弯——这让两个方向的车流都停了下来——接着跃下不是一名、而是四名消防员。其中两名忙着准备发电机和钳子——那应该是世上最大的一对钳子,另外两名站在我身旁,耐心地听着我滔滔不绝的狂热致谢。车锁很快被截开了,我再次拥有了行走伦敦的自由。

10.伦敦并非到处都是随时准备对你下手的小偷。这里有的是善良热心的人,其中包括四名英俊不凡的消防员。
fairy8866 发表于 2009-5-19 09:39:38
1# chrislau2001

thanks
fairy8866 发表于 2009-5-19 09:39:59
very mice article, this article is not to easy to understand, some sentences are difficult, thanks for the chinese translations that help me understand easily,hhe
快速回复 返回顶部 返回列表