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英文小幽默(6)

发布者: zhenru | 发布时间: 2007-6-15 11:43| 查看数: 3879| 评论数: 2|

懂得一门外语的重要性

A cat and her four kittens ran into a large dog. When the kittens cowered, the cat let out a series of loud barks, scaring the dog away.

Turning to her kittens, the cat said, "You see how important it is to know a second language."

一只大猫带着四只小猫,突然路遇一只大狗,小猫吓的往后退缩,这时大猫对着狗一阵大吠,把狗吓跑。

大猫扭头对小猫说:“看到没有,知道懂得一门外语的重要性了吧。”



英语幽默:男人和女人

Smart(精明的) man + smart woman = romance

Smart man + dumb(愚蠢的) woman = pregnancy(怀孕)

Dumb man + smart woman = affair

Dumb man + dumb woman = marriage

Smart boss + smart employee = profit

Smart boss + dumb employee = production

Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion

Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime

A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.

To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot & not try to understand her at all.

Married men lived longer than single man, but married men are a lot more willing to die.

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.

A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.

A woman has the last word in any argument.

Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

There are 2 times when a man doesn't understand a woman - before marriage and after marriage.



我只把扣眼儿给缝上了 Just Sew the Buttonhole

Husband: Did you sew the button on my shirt, darling?

Wife: No, dear. I couldn't find the button, so I just sewed up the buttonhole.

丈夫:你给我把扣子缝好了吗,亲爱的?

妻子:没有,亲爱的。我找不到扣子,所以我只把扣眼儿给缝上了。



That's what I want to find out

-- We have got a new dog, would you like to come around and play with him?

-- Well, I don't know. Does he bite?

-- That's what I want to find out.

-- 我们又得到了一只新狗,你要过来和他玩玩吗?

-- 哦, 我不知道。他咬人吗?

-- 这正是我想要知道的。

最新评论

海伦 发表于 2007-6-18 10:34:18
so funny.........
phantom 发表于 2007-6-19 14:47:12
Dumb man + dumb woman = marriage
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